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A Blessing in Disguise

7/26/2014

When we joined the gymnastics world with our little monkey, our world really changed. She had become a member of the team. This meant spending six hours per day, five days per week, working out and conditioning. Learning and mastering new skills was not an easy task. What about school? The gym did offer a private school for the students to attend. If we chose that option, she would have spent even more time in the gym. I was not willing to have her spend an additional five hours away from us every day. Several of the girls were being homeschooled. I was a little nervous about trying this option. Was I qualified? Would she be missing out on her education? So many questions!

We decided to give homeschooling a try. In the beginning, we used two different curriculums, ABeka and Alpha Omega. We also decided to homeschool our oldest daughter. She had really been struggling in public school. She really needed to relearn some of the basics in English and Math. Our youngest was beginning the first grade and our oldest had just finished the fifth grade. I started in the summer, just in case I could not measure up to my own expectations. I had both of them start with the first grade in the core subjects. We would work both curriculums. Our oldest little angel did additional schoolwork while her little sister was at the gym. I would have one on one time with our little monkey while the oldest took ballet classes in the evening. It was great. We were able to also teach some of the things that are not emphasized in public schools. Important things like morals, self discipline, time management, respect and responsibilities. Our oldest child got the one on one time that she needed to get caught up to where she needed to be.

As they each got to the upper grades, we transitioned to an online curriculum. That was awesome because it took some of the burden away from me. I am so thankful that we decided to homeschool. They both graduated from High School and went on to further their education in their field of choice. Our first child is now a Massage Therapist. She took her state boards at the ripe old age of 19. That was seven years ago and today she is one of the best in her field.

Our little monkey decided that her "Olympic Dreams" had become "Olympic Nightmares" and made the choice to not do gymnastics as a teenager. She had endured enough of the injuries. We gave her the choice to either go back to public school or continue with the homeschooling. She chose the homeschooling. Most of her friends were in public school and she had heard the horror stories of their days. She wanted no part of the drugs, gangs and just plain ugliness that her friends had endured. She has always loved animals, especially dogs. She decided that she wanted to become a dog groomer and has now completed the schooling for that. She has always wanted to be a veterinarian and this is a stepping stone in that direction.

I am so glad that the decision to homeschool was made. Our daughters have grown into the most responsible and respectful young adults. Never once did we have a problem with drugs or alcohol or any "wild" behavior. Our oldest met her first boyfriend and had her first date at age 17. She never dated anyone else and they married when she was just a few weeks shy of her 21st birthday. Believe it or not, her wedding night was just a pure as a wedding night should be. Our youngest had her first date when she was 17, too! This was not a rule in our house. It is just the way things turned out. Her first date was with a brother of one of our oldest daughter's best friends. They have been dating for nearly 3 years and are getting married in April of next year. She, too, believes in "waiting". This is not because my children are prudish, it is their own personal beliefs. I have always had wonderful, open discussions with them. They were exposed to the same television programs and movies as every other teen and young adult. The difference is that we were able to discuss how decisions that are made can change your life. I made sure that they knew that each thing that you do can have an impact on the rest of your life. I believe that homeschooling allowed us that kind of openness and interaction. I believe that we are closer because of homeschooling.

What are your thoughts on homeschooling? What do you think about them only dating one guy and knowing that "he" was the one? What are your thoughts on "waiting"?

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Doing the Happy Dance

7/25/2014

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I am so excited right now that I just have to share! My life has turned around so much in the last four and a half years. Many of you know that I was diagnosed with Small Cell Carcinoma of the Lung and only given a 15% chance of survival. I went through eight rounds of chemotherapy and six weeks of daily radiation. This all was over an eight month period. With chemo, you get steroids with each dose. I gained a lot of weight on an already overweight body. I am so thankful to be still in remission. I am thankful for each and everyday!

Last September, I saw a post on Facebook for this all natural weight loss supplement called Skinny Fiber. I ordered a six month supply and I planned on sharing with my youngest daughter. We were to take two capsules thirty minutes to an hour before our two biggest meals of the day. It is important to drink enough water when taking any fiber supplements. After one month, I was so impressed that I decided to become a distributor.

Well, as of this week, I have lost 51 pounds and I feel better than I have since way before the whole cancer ordeal! My daughter has also lost over 35 lbs. This is so amazing! There are so many supplements that I can not take because they give me the jitters, but Skinny Fiber does not do that at all. I can tell you that it has taken away my cravings for junk food. I crave fresh vegetables and I only want water to drink. I used to drink Diet Pepsi from the time I woke up until the time I went to bed. I feel so much healthier! My husband loves the new healthier me! My doctors are amazed and some of them are now recommending Skinny Fiber. I am so happy that it just makes me want to dance!

If you or anyone that you know is struggling on a weight loss journey, please tell them about my story and let them check it out for themselves. Here is the link to order or to learn more about Skinny Fiber. www.getslimwithskinnyfiber.com

Have a wonderful day and I hope to hear from you soon.

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Grandma's Legacy

7/24/2014

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My Grandmother was a probably one of the kindest, most loving, people in the world. She always amazed me with her knack of seeing the good in people. I do not believe that she ever had a negative word to say about anyone. In addition to being a very talented seamstress and a wonderful cook, she had a way of making you feel totally loved. She listened to what you had to say and she knew how to talk to you in a way that made you feel special. Ever since I could remember, she wrote poems, short stories and songs.

Helen Louise Pinkerton was born in Rochester, New York in 1914. Her parents had nine children and she was the very middle child. I have been told that her father was an inventor and that he actually invented the little pour spout on the Morton salt box. How cool is that? She married her high school sweetheart, John H. Saulsman and they had five children of their own. They moved to Texas in the mid to late 1940's. She taught Sunday School and had a few of her things published in Scribe Magazine.

In 1997, she had one of her stories published in the Say Goodnight To Illiteracy campaign. In 1998,she published her children's book From Grandma With Love! Oh, the fun we had doing a book signing tour and reading to the children. She even got to read to children on a cable television program. She was absolutely adorable, sitting in a great big rocking chair, surrounded by children, and sharing her stories. I believe she was finally getting the recognition that she deserved.

In 1999 she published her book A Potpourri of Poetry. It is filled with many of her poems and thoughts and even a few short stories and songs. These books were her legacy to all of us that knew her. Sadly, we said good-bye to her about 3 years ago. Heaven gained a special angel that day and I am sure that she is sharing her stories with all of the little children in heaven with her. She would have been 100 years old this year and I miss her daily. The memories of Grandma bring me great comfort and she is who I would like to be when I grow up.

Grandma would have loved blogging! I am sure of it! Do you have someone that inspired you to write?

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Our Little Monkey

7/23/2014

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Even before we made the move from our small home to the older, larger home, I had a good idea that our youngest daughter was part monkey. She could climb out of her crib by the age of eight months. Yes, she was walking and talking and even had a mouth full of teeth by then. She was the most observant child that I had ever seen. She would try everything and the was no fear!

Butterfinger Pie was one of our family favorites. You have to crush Butterfinger candy bars to use in the recipe. I would hide the candy bars in a bowl on the top shelf of the upper Kitchen cabinets. One day, while I was helping her big sister with her homework, our little , two year old monkey, pushed a chair over to the cabinets and climbed onto the countertop and then climbed up the top cabinets to get the Butterfingers. I found her in her room with the rubber mallet and she had smashed all the butterfingers into the carpet. She did not use a bowl or a plastic bag. But she did a great job of getting the candy crushed!

Then there was the day that my husband was on the roof and our little monkey climbed the ladder to join him. We almost had a heart attack. She was always climbing trees. Big trees. Little trees. She climbed the doorways. She would just shimmy up the sides. She would climb on top of their playhouse and then step over onto the roof of the house. One day we outside talking to our neighbors and our little monkey had decided to shimmy up the street light in front of our house. We could not turn our backs on her for even one second. That was it! I was a nervous wreck. We made the decision to enroll her in gymnastics. She was only four years old, but with the way she climbed on everything, we decided that at least she would learn how to fall and not get hurt.

She did love her gymnastics classes. She wanted more. It did not take long for her to move up to the team. This meant gymnastics for six hours per day, five days per week. She would eat, drink and sleep gymnastics. She loved climbing the ropes. I loved that there was a sponge pit below that rope! Finally, we had found an outlet for our little monkey.

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An Angel Among Us

7/22/2014

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Our little house was bulging at the seams after the adoption of our second child. It was a beautiful, small home that my husband and I built before we had married. It had many custom features and it sat upon a big hill. Our driveway was very steep. This was great for keeping away the door to door sales people, but not so great for maneuvering small children in and out of the mini-van.

After our youngest baby's first birthday, I took my mom to the doctor. We discovered that her breast cancer had returned with a vengeance . She had seven tumors on her brain and bone cancer. She was sent home with hospice and I stayed with her for the entire six weeks and three days. We set up a hospital bed in her middle bedroom. I made a cot out of two large ottomans and I slept there by her side. I was the one that had to administer her medicines, check her blood sugar and monitor her vital signs. I helped bathe her and change her night gown. I would brush her hair and clean her teeth. The highlight of her day would be when my husband would bring our children for her to see. Her health deteriorated fast. The last few hours were very strange. She could not talk but she was speaking volumes with her eyes! Then she just kind of shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes, as if to say " whatever, here I go"! And she was gone.

My brother and sister and I tried to sell our mother's house. Everything in it was out dated. The floors and bathrooms were avocado green. The fixtures were out of style. Long story short was that no one wanted to pay anything for it. My husband and I decided to buy out my siblings part. We sold our beautiful, little house and moved the 25 miles to this older but much larger home.

Our youngest was two by this time. She was talking and into everything. I was trying to get things unpacked. We would paint a room and then decorate and unpack that room. The girls made the front bedroom their room. One day, our little two year old comes running into the living room and says " Mommy! Mommy! There is an angel in my room!" She starts pulling my hand and is very anxious for me to come with her. We get to her room and she starts pointing at the little bit of wall above the curtains and says " See Mommy! See the angel". I did not see anything! She continued to tell me that it was right there. She was really getting mad that I could not see it. I finally just said yes that I saw it. I just needed to get back to work. There was just so much left to do.

The next day, I was still unpacking in the living room. I was putting some pictures on the bookshelf. Our little baby got so excited and started pointing at the picture of my mom and said " See, Mommy! There is that angel" I know that I started crying! Had she seen my mom in her room? How was it that she could see and I could not. What do you think? Did she really see my mom?

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Milk, Bread and Would you Like a Baby With That?

7/21/2014

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If you have read any of my blogs, then you know that I am a very friendly person. I do not know a stranger. I always stopped for gas at the little convenience store by our home and if I needed anything else, I would just pick it up there. Well, on this day, I needed to go inside to pick up a few things. When I walked in, I noticed that the cashier was crying. I asked her if she was okay. She told me that she had just found out that she was pregnant and that her mom was already raising one child for her. She said that she did not know what she was going to do! I asked if she had considered adoption? I told her that there are so many couples that wanted to adopt a baby. I said " You know that our baby is adopted!" I was thinking of all that we had gone through when we were adopting our precious baby and I was hoping that she would choose to help some childless couples dream come true. I was not even thinking about us adopting because we had already been blessed. She seemed to calm down and I wrote a check for my purchases.

The very next day, she called me and asked if we would consider adopting her baby! I was in shock. I told her that considering that she had just found out and that she was very emotional right then, that I wanted her to think it over, to make sure that this was what she wanted. My own tummy was doing flip-flops! I was so excited! I told her calmly, "Wait until after the Holiday's and if this is what you really want to do then call me back"! This was right before Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year Holiday's.

January 2nd, our phone rang! Oh, my goodness! My excitement could not be contained! Was this really happening? We decided to use a midwife and a birthing center. She and I would go for her prenatal appointments. I would record the baby's heartbeat. We would go to lunch and discuss baby names. We had many heart to heart conversations. I went with her to inform the daddy. He did not speak any English and she did not speak any Spanish. I guess body language is International! He said that he would sign the papers when the time came. She and I became very close. We started walking together every day. We continued with the prenatal appointments and the lunches. I talked with the attorney and had the papers drawn up. Nothing could be signed until the baby's arrival. Our daughter was so excited, too! She said that she just knew it was going to be a sister. I told her that it might be a brother. "Oh, no!" she said, "It will be my sister!"

Late one night in early April, the contractions began. We all jumped in the car and headed to the Birthing Center. All of us being the birth mother, myself, my husband and our five year old daughter! What a night! While my husband and daughter slept on the sofa in the waiting room, I helped with the birthing process. I was not really prepared for all that entailed. I held her hand during contractions and I helped her to breathe. I massaged her feet. I washed her back. I wiped the sweat from her brow and forehead. Early the next morning, it was time! I got to assist and I even got to cut the cord! How symbolic was that?

I cleaned up our new little angel and wrapped her in a blanket, I carried her to the waiting room to meet her sister and her daddy. Our oldest said " I told you that it would be a sister!" We took group photos with the birth mother. We made all of the fun phone calls. My mother came to join us. We were one big happy family. We called the attorney and he came to the birthing center, too. The papers were signed, except for the biological father. We waited to go home. I learned how to doctor the umbilical cord. By noon, we were ready to go home. My mom, and my husband and our two beautiful daughters left in one car and I took the biological mother to her home. I felt strange leaving her at home alone. I stayed for a little while to see if she was alright. She was as happy for us as we were for ourselves. It was like it was just meant to be! She was an angel bearing the most precious gift. I will always have a special place in my heart for her.

We hired a person to translate the papers into Spanish for the biological father. He signed the papers with no problem. All he cared about was that his wife did not find out. We never even knew that he was married. All is well, that ends well!

Six months later, after the home studies and referral letters were done, we went to court. Our oldest daughter got to hit the gavel and pronounce the adoption final. Our little family was now complete. I believe in miracles! Do you?

Do you believe in Angels or even Ghosts? Tomorrow's post is sure to give you goose bumps!

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E is for Education or Is it for The Enormous Elephant in the Room?

7/20/2014

12 Comments

I have to admit that I am a very determined (some say stubborn) person. I refused to believe that our little angel had any disabilities other than her speech. She was enrolled in the local public school for pre-k for half a day because of the speech problems. I thought that being around other children would be great for her. She did make friends easily and she was learning so much. The speech part was still a bit inconsistent. Just when we thought she had a sound mastered and would go on to the next sound, the first sound would slip back into the old pattern. Oh, but let another child say a phrase like "do-do head" and that would be repeated with no problem! Oh, the joys of motherhood! She had made some of her best friends in Pre-K.

Kindergarten was a half of a day, too! It was held in a great big room with a divider right down the middle of the room. There was a class on each side of the divider. Each day when our baby would come home, I would ask what they had done that day. Well, I would hear all about what the other side had done and nothing about her side of the room. I was asked to fill out a questionnaire about ADD/ADHD. I, in my infinite wisdom, believed that this was crazy. I believed that the reason she could tell me about the other class and not her own was because the teacher on the "other side" was young and energetic and that our teacher was just a year away from retirement! The other class was just more fun. I was surprised when at the Parent-Teacher conference, it was suggested that we repeat Kindergarten. The other option was Summer School. We chose Summer School.

We discovered that our baby's eyesight was not right. Yes, she had passed the screening at school. At home, I noticed that she was squinting a lot. She always wanted to sit right on top of the television screen. The optometrist was awesome. He said that she did ,in fact, need glasses. Her eyesight was very unique for a child. She could not see up close. It was a perceptual problem. When she got her glasses, she was sitting on the floor in our living room and she said, " Mommy, our carpet goes up and down, up and down!" We had sculptured carpet and she had never noticed.

First grade was a big adjustment to all day school. I had read that taking sugar and red food coloring out of your child's diet could help them to pay attention better. Well, you would have thought that I was a horrible mother. Borderline abusive! Not that our baby felt that way. She was fine with the new, healthier diet. It was her teacher! She believed in giving the children cookies everyday for a treat. Instead of a good, healthy snack, she would pump them full of sugar and then complain about how hyper the kids were. I even would send healthy choices to the school for them and she said that they were not allowed. Imagine that! She could bring junk and that was okay. But the parents could not send goodies for the class. When our daughter would go to speech class, they would give her candy for a job well done. I think that this was the year that my education began.

This was also the year that we had many changes in our lives. We adopted our second child ( this one we got from the local convenience store! I will tell that awesome story tomorrow) and my mom got sick.

See you tomorrow and please, have an awesome day!

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D is for Determination....Not Disabilities

7/19/2014

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When our precious baby came to live with us at 13 months, she was sick. She had pink eye in both eyes and a bad upper respiratory infection. She also had the a severe case of diaper rash. She also had a little tremor. A tremor that seemed to come and go at various times. The medicine that the doctor gave her on that first night, took care of most of these ailments. The tremor stayed. She had only one little tooth and was not yet walking or talking. She had obviously been neglected (if not abused) during those first months of her precious little life. Of course, we took her to the pediatrician to get caught up on shots and to get a thorough check-up. He informed us that she was a "coke" baby. That the biological mother had used cocaine. This is what the little tremors were from. Oh, my poor little baby had been through so much in her short little life.

Did I tell you just how precious she was? She was the most affectionate child that I had ever seen! When she laughed, which was very often, you just knew that a diaper change was necessary. Big contagious belly laughs. She was not yet walking, but she could crawl like nobody's business. I would get down on the floor and crawl chase her from one end of our living room to the other and then we would just roll on the floor laughing! Within a month, she was up walking. Within a couple of months, she was beginning to talk. The talking part was a bit slower than normal and the words that came out of that precious little mouth were not pronounced the same as you might think. Yes, there was the usual "dink" for drink. One of the most unusual ones was the word that she used for hungry. Can you imagine my surprise, while we were dining out at a restaurant and my sweet little angel said, just as plainly as could be " Mommy, I HORNEY!" I am sure that everyone in the restaurant heard her. I saw many smiling faces. I hurriedly gave her some crackers!

Oh, how she loved to sing and dance! I thought this was just the cutest thing. When she was three years old, I thought I would sign her up for a ballet dance class at one of those summer recreation places. It was held in a gymnasium. I sat with all of the other mommies in the bleachers. As all of the little darlings lined up to play follow the leader, my little angel was doing her own interpretation of how it should go. All of the other parents were laughing at my child. They were pointing their fingers and laughing! I was not impressed with their behavior, especially when their own little darlings started copying the parents. They were all pointing and laughing at my baby. So when the instructor suggested that maybe this was not the class for her, I agreed. We did not need that kind of negativity.

The speech issues continued to get attention. She would pronounce the "chr" sound as a "p". Not a huge problem, unless your cousins name was Chris. He really would get angry when she would call him "piss". We had decided to get our little princess tested for learning disabilities at Scottish Rite Children's Hospital. In addition to the speech difficulties, they said that she was developmentally delayed by about 13 months. Umm....13 months is exactly how long it took for her to come into our lives. I do not think that people realize just how important those first years are to the children. She began speech therapy right away and we continued to just love, play and learn together. We were determined that our special gift from above was not disabled. We were determined that with plenty of love and prayer that all things are possible.

Next time I will tell you all about how attending public school went and the unique challenges that we faced at every turn.

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C is for Court..... Continuing Our Adoption Story

7/18/2014

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We never dreamed that the biological father might protest the adoption! We could not understand why. He had not even been a part of her life for 19 months, so why? We were so nervous on our court day! Our entire family had come to stand in support of our adoption. If you have never been to court for an adoption, you should go. The room is packed with people that are either adopting or having their parental rights removed. It is a very emotionally charged room. There are dozens of people anxiously awaiting the ruling of the judge. Some people are happy to be there. Some people are sad to be there. Some are even angry to be there. But they all are very nervous and we were no exception! I looked around the room, trying to figure out who the biological father was. I was clueless! Not one of the people looked anything like our precious angel or maybe they all did!

Our attorney stood up when our name was called. He presented our case to the judge. The attorney for our baby was asked to weigh in on the matter. He told the judge that we had loved and nurtured this baby for the previous six months and that while this did seem like an ideal situation that the biological father was there and wanted to speak. My heart stopped for what seemed like an eternity. A tall man, about our age walked to the front of the courtroom and asked the judge if he would appoint him an attorney, that he could not afford one. The judge asked how did he intend to care for this child if he could not even afford an attorney. He said that he did not intend to care for her and that he thought that maybe he would see if his sister might care for her. The judge said that he would hear the case and make his decision after a short recess!

Oh, do you know how bad I had to fight the urge to just grab our child and run? It took all of the inner strength that I had to stay. I am so glad that I did because the biological father came up to us and introduced himself. He said that he did not even recognize his own child and he wanted to know how we knew the biological mother. I told him that we had never met her face to face. I told him that I had talked to her on the phone and that our attorney had met her in person. He said that we seemed like real nice folks and that he would be happy to sign the papers! Court resumed on a much happier note. The judge was awesome and explained how in his court, once an adoption was granted that it was forever and nothing could undo it! ADOPTION GRANTED!

Really, the story does not end there. It is really just the beginning. The beginning of a life full of love and understanding. It is the beginning of learning and nurturing a beautiful child that was diagnosed as being a "coke" baby and the learning disabilities that come with that diagnosis. It is just the beginning of the most rewarding experience a parent can ever have and the bond that comes from that love. I hope that you will join me as I share some of these experiences. Remember that all things are possible!

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A is for Adoption and B is for Baby.......

7/17/2014

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There were so many near adoptions during those two years. Each one that did not work out, just served to make me more determined. There was the day that a baby boy was born that we were supposed to adopt and we were so excited. Just as we were fixing to get in the car, our phone rang and the attorney said that she had changed her mind. Do not go to the hospital. Do not collect the baby. Do not become parents.

Or the time that another precious little baby was born that we were going to adopt and we got to the hospital, he was isolated away from all the other babies. He was in a total separate room. There were hazard signs everywhere! The biological mother had to tell us the news that he was born with Aids. Now this was back in the 1980's and Aids was just becoming known about. There was not a distinction between HIV and Aids. It was pretty doom and gloom. We were still interested but we were told "no" that he would not be available for adoption. This was probably the saddest of those near adoptions.

So, on this day that the hairdresser called, my butterflies were in overdrive. I was trying to not get my hopes up too much. But that is just not in my nature. She went on to say that a friend of a friend had a baby that was 13 months old. She said that the girl wanted someone to take her baby that very day. The girl had wanted to put her baby up for adoption when she was born, but her father had talked her into giving it one year. My hairdresser said that she would go pick up the baby and meet us in the parking lot of the beauty salon. Normal people would have been suspicious. Not me! I always believed that if we kept trying, that our baby would arrive.

Of course, we were waiting when she got there! I jumped out of our car and jerked open her backseat door. There was the most precious little angel that I had ever seen! She held out her little arms for me to pick her up and I just melted! She was mine! We did get all of the information that we needed to get, including the phone number and name for the biological mom. We would have to wait until Monday to call the attorney. We brought our little angel home. I gave her a bath. She had the worst diaper rash that I had ever seen. She was sick and she was miserable. We took her to a weekend minor emergency clinic. She had pink eye in both eyes. She had an upper respiratory infection. She had a terrible diaper rash. We got all of the medicine that we needed to make our little angel all better. We went to the store to buy diapers and clothes. She kept having these little tremors. I thought she might be cold and I bundled her up. She just clung to me like glue. I ate it up! My heart was happy. I called the biological mom and got as much information as I could. Family health history. Information on the mom, in case the attorney needed it. I gave her the attorney's name, address and phone number.

On Monday morning I called the attorney. I told him what had happened. He could not believe it! He said he would talk to the biological mom and get started on the paper work. We continued to bond with our precious gift! There was so much to do! There were home studies to be done by the state. There were referral letters that our friends and co-workers had to write. There was financial records that our CPA needed to get done for the state. The biological father had to be notified. We had to take parenting classes. Also, in Texas, the child has to live with you for at least six months before you can finalize an adoption. The court also appoints a separate attorney to represent the child. We were getting it all done. Day by day. Week by week. We were getting closer to realizing our dreams. The six months was right around the corner. Then came the papers that said the biological father was protesting the adoption!!!

Oh, it couldn't be......................

Tomorrow ..........C is for Court!

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Forward>>

A Blessing in Disguise

Doing the Happy Dance

Grandma's Legacy

Our Little Monkey

An Angel Among Us

Milk, Bread and Would you Like a Baby With That?

E is for Education or Is it for The Enormous Elephant in the Room?

D is for Determination....Not Disabilities

C is for Court..... Continuing Our Adoption Story

A is for Adoption and B is for Baby.......

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